Bailout News Stimulus Edition: Generational Rape with a trillion dollar Shovel

In this angry edition of bailout news, our attention turns to the Obama stimulus proposal as it grows it's way through Congress.  Aside from being a waste of a trillion dollars of borrowed money, we have found some value here.  There's talk of a new parking garage for the Orange Bowl and as much as $350 miilion earmarked for STD education.  Despite our obvious excitement for these projects, how will any of this patronage actually help the economy recover?

Also missing from the debate is the concern for our children and the unconscionable debt burden we are leaving them.  Keynesians, what value are you adding?  Your insane belief in the power of government spending is painful entertainment for the rest of us who can smell the bull the minute you hit town.  Where is the grand vision?  Where is the vital infrastrucure?  Why do these projects merit the borrowing of $1 trillion more from our children's increasingly dim futures?  We're still waiting to hear how each project will further our national interest. 

So stop wasting our time with your useless theory on how this giveaway will substantially boost the economy.  We're not buying it.  It didn't work in the 1930s and it's not going to work now.  Are you listening, Krugman.  The massive spending that accompanied our entrance into WWII brought us out of the depression.  Not the keynesian claptrap you so proudly cite.

So call this stimulus what it really is, generational rape with a trillion-dollar shovel, and it's but one more painful wrong turn as we continue on the path to federal bankruptcy.

Take a late day ride through hell, as we look at the 20 best reads on what's going down.  Xanax is included.

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Bank Bailout News: Taxpayers Tell Citigroup To Suck It. Pandit Complies.

It's always the little things.  In last week's row over the huge losses at Merrill Lynch, we learned that $15 billion of your kids' dough was flushed down the toilet in the form of year-end bonuses for Merrill staff.  And this in a year that Merrill saw cumulative losses of greater than $40 billion.  Though there was plenty of outrage, the story that really caught people's attention that day was the Gasparino piece in The Daily Beast about John Thain's $1.2 million dollar office redecoration.

Hmm.  We have $15 billion in ridiculous bonuses versus $1 million in walking toilets.  It was a commode with legs after all.  Advantage: commode.

Yesterday we learned that Citi was preparing to take delivery on a luxury 12-seater that they ordered in 2006.  The cost, $50 million.  Meanwhile Citi has stolen $45 billion from your kids already  (plus a $300 billion asset guarantee), all in the past 14 weeks.  Advantage: luxury 12-seater.

It's not that surprising, really.  Some outrages resonate more than others.  So today, in the first symbolic win for the taxpayers since the auto execs were forced to hitch a ride to Washington, Citi announced that it will not take delivery of the new plane.

And you know what, we'll take it.  Though mostly symbolic, a win is a win, and we sure as hell needed one.  So come on inside where the taxpayer takes a victory lap as we examine how it all went down.

We have 4 unique takes on the story, each a great read.  Plus, today was Citi's annual Investor Day and we've got the transcript of all the lies Pandit was telling.

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Bailout News: Music Video: F*k the Fed

Email This Song

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Bailout News Links: Fannie, Geithner, Citi, BAC, Thain and Lewis 'Tour of Lies'

This morning in our bailout news round-up, there are several stories to cover.  Geithner got the job in an easy vote despite his tax issues.  Phoney has made a formal request to Treasury for $16 billion in emergency funds (they'll need much, much more before it's over).  Shittygroup took possession of their new custom, corporate jet that you paid for, and the 'Thain and Lewis Tour of Lies' blossoms into a 'she said-she said' cat fight.  Good stuff.

These stories plus about 30 more await you on the other side, including word of stress-release squeezable, banker dolls resembling Paulson, Bernanke and others.  You can't make this stuff up. 

Don't be afraid to click, we promise there are no needles.  Just lean back and relax while you take a leisurely stroll down bailout lane.

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Bailout Comedy: BRAND NEW and Exclusive to DailyBail Readers: We Present 'MC Bailout'

We haven't yet posted any of the bailout songs that most of you have seen.  Now, we're glad we waited. Take a look at this video by stockbroker Gregg Somerville with music and production by Chris Conti. Gregg submitted it to us this morning and we're happy to showcase such excellent work.  Great job with the lyrics.  Enjoy as MC Bailoutgets a little crazy.  Stockbroker Thuglife.

And surely you have seen this video.  OVER 72,000 Visitors Have Come to DailyBail in Just the Past Week to See This Guy Lose His Mind About the Bailouts!

And Click here for the Song 'F*k the Fed'.   A Gentle Little Song About The Federal Reserve.  You will not be disappointed!

Wondering why he's so angry.  Read any of the following stories and you will have a pretty good idea.  The taxpayer is being fleeced and we are finally getting appropriately angry!

Generational Rape With a Trillion-Dollar Shovel

Taxpayers Tell Citi to SUCK IT!  Pandit Complies.

Taxpayers: Behold Your New Leader, Sheila Bair.  Bad Bank CEO.

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Beach Party Bailout! Bailout News for Monday, Jan. 26

It's a new day, a new trading week, and the never-ending flow of bailout news continues this morning. Everyday is Groundhog's Day at DailyBail and we're stuck in the vortex.

Take a Monday morning stroll through the taxpayer mine field as you see where your money is headed today.

We're in a decidedly snarky mood this morning as you will see in our comments.  So if you are Bill Miller of Legg Mason or Ken Fisher, you might want to skip this one.  The remaining 6 billion of you, feel free to proceed.  And hey, at least we gave you some great comedy this weekend.

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There are no words to describe the following.

Updated on Apr 4, 2009 at 3:41 AM by DailyBail

The original video he made was pulled from youtube recently for violation of terms. The only violation we can imagine is that it was too damn good. He has since re-posted the exact same video with a new 5 second introduction that was a surprise to us but certainly appreciated.  That video is above.  Our original description is below.

This is the possibly the funniest RANT ever made.  It's the best we'ver ever come across.  Watch the entire video to the end!  It takes him about 30 seconds to get sufficiently warmed up.  You will not be sorry.  Warning: profane language throughout the rant.

See his newest video here.  It's even better in my view.  'Walstreetpro2' is his name on youtube.

While watching, please read about what we're trying to accomplish:  Taxpayer Iwo Jima

And search the right column for the latest bailout news, interviews, comedy videos, songs and other articles. We've loaded a ton of new stuff in the past few days.

Hilarious Comedy  video on Paulson, Bernanke and Bush.  Warning: very adult themes.

'F*ck the Fed'.  a gentle song about the Federal Reserve!

Here are  2 SNL Bailout Comedy Sketches.  Pelosi, Frank & Soros.  And Dick Fuld of Lehman.

Here are  the 2 Best Bailout Comedy Sketches from The Daily Show.  Highly recommended!

Click here  for a song/video from MC Bailout.  This is by far the Best of all the Bailout Songs!

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Bailout News Links For Saturday Night: Debt Party USA!

It's Saturday night and I have rounded up all the good stuff since yesterday plus a few surprises.

Take the Saturday evening click ride to check out all 45 Bailout stories and see where your children's future tax payments are headed.  Yes, I said 45.

Bring on the pain.  Enjoy!

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Freddie Mac Needs $35 BILLION, Yes $35 BILLION More From Your Kids

 

I'm speechless. Here's a snip:

"Given that they have $4.5 trillion of risk out there, $100 BILLION is a drop in the bucket,” Miller said. “Given the fact that their risk profile on these loans is greater than they led everyone to believe, greater than $100 billion in losses on each institution would not surprise me.”

He's talking about both Phoney and Fraudie above.  For now, only Fraudie is requesting additional funds. And again for the record: Fraudie already received $14 BILLION from your kids in november.  So they are back to the trough quickly.  Fannie's going to need at least $100 BILLION before this is over.  Another snip:

“Their losses are going to be much higher than anyone anticipated,” said Paul Miller, an analyst with FBR Capital Markets in Arlington, Virginia. “The more and more that people are digging into these portfolios, they’re finding out the more and more these guys were doing subprime and Alt-A loans and classifying them as prime.”

"Much Higher than anyone anticipated."  Are you kidding me.  I am so tired of hearing that.  Trust me, there are thousands of people who anticipated it.  The online forums, from the basic at marketwatch and yahoo, to silicon investor and investor's hub, and finally to the blog forums at calculated risk, naked capitalism, the big picture and many others, are full of people who DID anticipate everything we saw last year.  Once Bear Stearns failed in March, it became clear to us that no one else was any different than Bear and so they would all suffer the same fate eventually.  After all, they all owned the same type of assets and at near the same levels of leverage.  What was NOT anticipated, however, was the level of government intervention that would be utilized in an attempt to save them.

So, talk to your kids tonight and ask their permision to give another $35 BILLION of their money away to Fraudie.  Oh, and start laying the groundwork for the big talk with them.  No, not the one about sex and drugs.  The one about Phoney needing perhaps $100 BILLION pretty soon.  Let me know what they say, and then we'll let Obama and Geithner know whether they may have OUR CHILDREN'S FUTURE.

Click if you want the gory details of how Fraudie is ripping off your kids for another $35 BILLION.

Inside, you will also find today's second set of bailout links.

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Beach Party Bailout! Bailout News Links For Friday

Updated on Feb 4, 2009 at 7:19 AM by DailyBail

The weekend is mere hours away, but the bailout horror show just keep playing.  Fifteen worth presenting so far and it's only 6:45 am.  We have Peter Schiff writing that the bailouts are perpetuating the credit bubble.  And a nice angry piece by John Carney on Wall Street's disgusting sense of entitlement.

Just spike it and be prepared for your usual outrage as you read where your children's tax dollars are headed today.

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Bailout News: Warning! This Dog Will BITE: We Present The Awakened Taxpayer

Something happened today.  Was it a watershed day for taxpayers in their struggle for reason and  financial accountability from bailout recipients?  Still not clear, but the online forums, where even the most afflicted stalk quietly on most days, were today scenes of carnage, hemorraghing from the insatiable bloodlust of a seething beast, the angry American taxpayer.  The game, Bank CEO Bloodsport.  It was Rome, the Coliseum was SRO, and it was a bad, bad day to be a gladiator.  And the plebes were none too amused at Taxpayer Bitches Ken Lewis and John Thain. ( Yes. We own you now.  Gone are your days of waste on our children's dime.  Our recommendation: focus on the fight to keep your name from becoming a federal prison serial # and your suit from being exchanged for something more one-pieceish, and orange.  The quick-on, quick-off functionality of your new threads will soon make sense.)

For you have crossed a line.  And though occasionally appearing docile, not unlike a junkyard dog, this taxpayer does not like to be crossed.  And today, Thain and Lewis (or FP# 551008001 and FP# 551008002) , Mr. Leroy Brown woke up.

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RED ALERT. REPEAT. RED ALERT. ALL TAXPAYERS REPORT TO THE DECK! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! REPEAT! THIS NOT A DRILL!

Lewis and Thain are BANK PUNKS on the lamb from the taxpayer.  Please be advised that the suspects are considered to be extremely dangerous to any and all taxpayers, including their children.  Please do not approach or engage these bank punks.  UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!

Senior TaxpayerVoice Officials confirm to DailyBail that and we're quoting here: "these two PUNK-A$$ BITCHE$ broke into the U.S. Treasury Fortress sometime overnight and stole $15 BILLION DOLLARS from YOUR CHILDREN!"

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Beach Party Bailout! Thursday Morning Bailout News Links

The State of New York is broke.  Prince Alwaleed won't eat pig but invests like one.  And in some actual good news, Barney Frank is in hot water over a report he helped a Boston bank get some of your bailout money.   Those and gobs more are just one sad, click away.

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beach party bailout! Bailout News Links...Borat special edition

Chose this photo because the idea of Borat in a lime-green, one-piece thong running with the Baywatch Babes is the only pic out there more ridiculous than our government's current obsession with saving the amalgam of toxicity which we call banks.  With Treasury Secretary Nominee, Tim Geithner, testifying before the Senate this morning, there are bailout stories breaking all over the place.  We're happy to see Tall Paul Volcker make an appearance.  Hey Obama: why wasn't Volcker your pick from the start?

Take an afternoon click ride and see where your children's future tax payments are headed.

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